Even After ONE The day he saw her,he was seventeen,and she was five. Her parents lived in another city,and she stayed with hergrandma an d a cat. People called her“Kitty”,she called him“Uncle”--he was her father‘s youngest cousin. The first time he saw her,she was sitting in a large bed alone,lea ning forward,surrounded by a circle of postcards. He listened to her mu mbling of stories she made up by herself,and gave her his hand. She was alarmed and lifted her head,her large eyes were filled with hostility. For a moment he was mesmorized by those eyes,bright,lonely eyes,on such a tiny girl - She seemed so lonely. She avoided his hand with pride. He smiled. Kitty,Kitty,I come to rescue you. She stared at him with distrust,he smiled again. Moments after staring at each other,she gave in,and placed her tin y fingers in his palm. He said to himself,Kitty,Kitty,I am going to t ake care of you,for my life.He became her father and playmate in the day s afterwards. He played games with her,and taught her homework. One day he noticed her fear of water,so he took her to a creek. But she insisted on staying on the bankside. He took off his shoes,stepped into shallow water,teasing her. With hesitation,she took his hand,so he led her into the pond,step by step. Her little feet turned red in the freezing water,but she remained calm. At that moment,he was her only trusted kin and lover-her only lover. She did not attend her primary school entry exams until she was seve n. The nights before her entry exams,he taught her maths,and play her Guitar after lessons. She loved the song“Return to Sorento”,so she as ked him to play again and again,listening quietly while he was playing. That day he was waiting anxiously outside the exam hall,and finally he saw her came out of the door,giggling. Uncle,she said,play me the song“Return to Sorento”? He smiled. She went to the best primary school in town. He didn‘t visit her often after her parents returned to Shanghai. Y ears later,he got married,the bride also had large and bright eyes,ju st like her. TWO She started living with a man when she was in university. At that ti me he had become a renowned lawyer. That was a afternoon when he happened to walk by her apar-tment. Sud denly he felt the urge of seeing her. He didn not see her much since he got married,and since she grew up. The only chance he could meet her was on grandma‘s birthday parties. A lways with her long and straight hair,and still a quiet girl,every tim e she touched his heart with those large,innocent eyes. His wife never stopped talking to him,so he could hardly find any chance talking to he r,other than a mere hello. He knocked. The door was not locked. He heard“come in”,and carefu lly stepped in. The room was a bit gloomy,but it was tidy. He saw her i roning her boyfriend‘s clothes,one by one,carefully,trousers after s hirts. He was hypnotized by her movement,and almost felt like he returned to the day when she was a child,sitting in a circle of postcards,almos t in solitude,waiting for his rescue. He could not help reaching out hi s hand,trying to touch her smooth forehead. She lifted her head,whispe red the word“uncle”,and continued with her work. He noticed the pictu re of her boyfriend on her desk,a cool looking man,cleanly shaved face, with a charming smile that melted girls. Somehow he was worried. He couldn not help imagining that she sacrif iced her lectures to stay in the house,cleaning,ironing,cooking dinne r,and waiting for her boyfriend‘s return. Afterall,it was sad that a girl would lost herself for a man,but he couldn’t find a word to say. He had been her uncle,her only kin,and only lover. Now she had grown u p,and he was just another man. She finished her ironing at dusk,and began busy with preparing dinn er. She shyly invited him for dinner,but he politely turned down her in vitation and left with sunken heart. Well,as long as she‘s happy. She seemed so happy,with a man strange to him. He was only her uncl e. He was going to fade away from her life. He was going to disappear fr om her life,not leaving a trace. He wandered hours in the street before he finally walked home. His w ife would never know,why he kissed her eyes when they made love. Those bright eyes,her eyes. THREE He was in a lecture for a law school when he received the notice. Wi thout a word he dashed out,leaving his class in puzzled chattering. He ran as if his life was depending on it. My Kitty,my angel,my li fe. She was in hospital. He was afraid that he would never see her again. Her boyfirend had left her,so she turned on the gas. He saw her parents waiting by a door. He threw the door open,and th ere was his Kitty,under a white sheet,black hair spreading all over th e pillow. He approached her. She opened her eyes,whispered“uncle”. Kitty,Kitty,Uncle is here,Uncle has come to rescue you. She gave a pale smile,and reached out a skinny arm. He grabbed her cold fingers. He promised to himself,he would take care of her for his life,he w ould never leave her again. He read her boyfriend‘s files,and found that he was only a rascle living on girls. The man cackled when he found him,“Hey,she wanted tha t way,she’s men‘s slave by nature.” He slapped that handsome face,only received another cackle,“Go ah ead,I owe her anyway.”He raised his fist. The handsome face saw something in his eyes,“You love her……you s ure you are her uncle?” He turned his back at the punk and left. She was released from hospital a week later. He took her to his plac e rightaway. Her parents agreed,in fear that her boyfriend might show u p again. His wife quietly took care of her. He knew his wife noticed som ething,as he can see from her eyes,but he did not say anything. He did not know how to explain,that his heart was occupied by a gir l,since she was five,and till forever. FOUR Eventually she left. In a sunny afternoon,he found her note. Goodbye uncle. I‘m pregnant,it's his baby. My baby will need a fat her,I‘m sorry. He looked up and saw the pots steaming on the stove,the clothes she aired at the balcony were still damp. He could almost smell her in the room,but he knew she was gone. He could no longer find strength in his legs,so he sat down on the floor,and burst into tears. He did not go looking for her. He remembered his cats when he was a boy. Cats always ran away,most of the time they returned,until one day they didn‘t. She was a cat,a nd she would probably not return this time. He never kept a cat since then. Three years later,however,he received her call. Uncle,she said,w ould you come and pick me up?He remembered those eyes and once again he could not resist. He came to her as quickly as he could. He saw her in Guangzhou,together with that handsome face. That punk dumped her again,and made her a prostitute,until she was sick and wea k,and could no longer satisfy those men. He saw them took her out. She could barely stand,only those bright eyes on her withered face stared a t him. A little girl stood next to her. He tried to step closer,but was stopped by the man, “Fifty thousand dollars and they are yours. Both of them. No discou nts.” He looked at her,she whispered“uncle”. He remembered his promise, and nodded at the man, “I need some time for the cash.” He heard the familiar cackle,“I can wait but she can‘t. Shes sick you know.” He flew back to shanghai the same night to prepare the cash,and ret urned three days later with the amount. The man gave him a disdainful sm ile,“You are late. The price was just raised to a hundred thousand.” He could not possibly have that kind of money,not possible from his insignificant savings and salary. And he had visited all his relatives and friends for the ransom. He looked at her,she smiled weakly,“Uncle,take my daughter. I am not going to make it anyway.”He turned to the little girl. She had her eyes,bright,large eyes. He remembered those eyes again,eyes of such a little girl,reaching out her hand with hesitation. He was her only ki n,her only lover. He had nothing to lose now,and he reached for his pistol. The gun was stolen from a policeman friend. He knew the law well,an d he knew the consequences. But he must save her,he must. His life was destined to be insaparable with this woman,since she was five. He aimed and pulled the trigger,in the orange flashes he saw people dodging and scattering,he saw Kitty‘s eyes wide opened,and he barely heard the little girl screaming. He kept firing. Die,you bastard,die,you ruined her life,you ruin ed my love‘s life,you will never hurt her again. A body collapsed in front of him. He somehow enjoyed looking at the twisted face. Kitty,Kitty,Uncle has come to rescue you. He can‘t hurt you anymore,not anymore. His finished his clip and the last round in the chamber. There was d ead silence,before the wailing of sirens surrounded him. FIVE He had some very good lawyer friends,and the man he shot happened t o be a wanted criminal. He surprisingly received only five years sentenc e. Kitty did leave him,however. Before she died,she placed her fingers in his palm. “I am leaving, uncle. Sorry I didn‘t listen to you.” He could barely see her through his tears. And he remembered her,sitting in a large bed,he remembered those i nnocent eyes filled with hostility. And he smiled,Kitty,Kitty,Uncle has come to rescue you. She believed and gave him her hand. He did not save her,he could no t save her. For that he could never forgive himself. She whispered,Uncle,could you take care of my daughter? He nodded with all that remained of his draining strength. She sighed,Uncle,I always wanted to listen to your “Return to Sor ento”……pity…… She sighed with a pale smile. Another three years passed. He received his parole,and took the lit tle girl from her grandparents. When he saw her,she was sitting on a stool,staring at the empty sk y. He said,hi. The little girl turned to him,and he saw those eyes again. He gave her his hand. When he felt her fingers in his palm,he asked,hey,what‘s you nam e? She said,I am Olivia. He was frozen with shock. Olivia……he struggled with a smile,I am Oliver. He cried. She forgave him afterall……She loved him. A few days later,he visited her grave with the child. Her photograp h was right on the gravestone,those bright eyes smiled at him. He turned to the child,young Olivia looked up shyly,giggled. For a moment,he thought he had returned to the day he saw her. (FIN) - translated by SerpentBlade,22 Oct,1999